Hello out there in blog land!
So...I know. It's been a while since I've updated. Yes...I have been busy and yes a lot has happened at work. Let's begin!
It happened again...another code. This time, day shift between 8 and 9 am. Yup...one of the first things I did that morning. I don't care what anyone says....coding someone is not my favorite things of nursing to do yet so much happens in those moments, it is almost like time goes out the window. In those moments, a second feels like a minute, a minute a hour. However, when it happens, it is the most adrenaline rush high I feel and the most exhausting things I do in my career as a nurse. Between the two codes I've had, I can see the differences in both. In the end, neither of them survived...and to me, it's tragic yet apart of the job I've undertook.
You never really get over it to be honest. You assess yourself over and over again and think "what could I've done differently?" More than often, it was nothing you could have done differently. You have to live with that is the best you could of done. With me, in everything that goes wrong, I learn from it. Just like the last code I was involved in, I take what I've learned and use it to better my nursing practice.
On top of living through that, in my personal life, things are shifting there. Apartment issues, maintenance, family conversations, it doesn't stop. The ever presence in my life is my relationship with God, and even that is changing as I go through the ever-changing events of my life. That is the point of it all, the ever present event of change.
No one likes drastic change. As creatures of habit, we were created for routine of some sort. The thing about it is I see the change that is occurring in others lives. My co-workers on my unit are hitting new milestones---career wise and in their personal lives. My family is seeing new events unfold. Even my boyfriend and I realized we were creating a new normal for us and seeing the different things we are doing now than when we first met. Change is ever present. Despite how nervous/anxious/scared I may feel when change first comes, I find comfort in knowing that my Creator did not give me the spirit of fear.
In the bible, some variance of do not fear and/or do not be afraid appears 365 times. If you know a standard year has 365 days, there is a daily reminder to not fear.
In closing, I know this. The point of it all in life is there is the constantance of change. You will have ups. You will have downs. The real question is--and how perfect is this...I can use a medical scenario--will you fight or flight? (Look up fight/flight in the human body! ^_^)
Thanks for reading! Feel free to share on social media!
3 things--
1. That I have central heat! It has been cold here in NC! Not 6+ feet of snow like in Buffalo, NY.
2. The presence of supportive family and friends.
3. I'm saving money in a major way! More details to come in a later post!
Lots of love,
Barbara <3